Prelim essay 2 writing

The movie Ordinary People inspired my essay 2 topic....I want to discuss the ideas of communication and miscommunication within families. I think lots of problems in relationships have to do with communication or the lack of it. This movie is a prime example of a strained relationship resulting from no communication. The mother and son do not talk to each other about how they treat one another. The son is upset because he thinks the mother doesn't love him enough and the mother can not forgive him for not being the son she loved more, who died.
The father says once that they are so alike, which makes sense because that means that they both react to situations the same way, they turn into them selves and don't seek outside council which makes their feelings unknown to the world. Nothing gets resolved that way because the feelings they have are not addressed, and therefore not changed.
I also find it interesting that the mother closes herself off by pretending that everything is alright. She is so obsessed with the appearance of her family to the outside world, she does not even consider the idea that there are problems, serious problems in her family. My extended family is very similar to that. There are several things that are known to everyone in the family that just aren't talked about.
Everyone wants to be perfect, but no one is. This movie is a great example of the fractures that people have and why it is important to communicate.

Essay 2

I think I want to write about Ordinary People for my essay 2. I really loved the reality of it. I think some of the other stories that we read were too much like fantasy but this story talks so much about things that are hard to talk about. The flawed relationships were all out in the open and ready for people to see.

I'm not sure exactly what I want to talk about, but I am interested in communication, and the lack of it as well. I might focus on how communication kills relationships. There is so much to talk about from this movie it is hard to choose! I guess I have some thinking to do...I'll post updates

Ordinary People pt. 3

This movie is such a good representation of reality. I can't get over how realistic the whole thing is. And the acting is more than perfect. The people are so involved with their characters that they just attacked the roles and made it perfect. I think the best judge of good acting is when you can't see the actor in the character. 

The last part of the movie really reveals the inner personality in each character. We see that the mother doesn't want to forgive Conrad and can't get over the death of her son, but wants everyone to think that she is perfectly fine. The father just wants everyone to be mentally fine and wants what's best for Conrad and Beth. He finally accepts his own feelings and doesn't hide them from anyone. We find out that Conrad will not forgive himself for not fighting to save Buck, but chose to save himself on the boat. 

Conrad has really separated himself from everyone who knew Buck. He told one of his old friends that "it hurts too much to be around you." I can completely understand that feeling. If something bad or emotionally painful happens to me I turn internally and don't communicate with the outside world. It is easier to be alone than with people. He is also mad at Buck for letting go and slipping. And then he feels guilty about being mad because he loves his brother and knows that those feelings are wrong, even if they are natural. 

This whole movie is glued together by awkward moments. The scene where Conrad hugs his mother is so real and awkward it is almost uncomfortable to watch. But it was sweet because it shows the growth of Conrad. I think that she was so surprised but it didn't faze her at all. She didn't take that gesture and think about what Conrad wants from her. I think she is so self involved that things like that just slip right by her. She can't imaging that this person that she has made into a terrible person has changed and wants to be a part of her life. 

I think the last scene is great because it shows the communication between Conrad and his father. The movie really ends on a note that is real and personal. The therapist helped Conrad communicate and talk about his feelings instead of closing himself off. He realizes that people need other people to survive. The father once said that Conrad and his mother are very much alike, and I can see that because they were both selfish, but in different ways. The mother is selfish because she doesn't think about other people and Conrad is selfish because he doesn't believe that other people need him. I am glad that this story ended the way it did because it shows that life is ongoing and there is no definate end to it. 

Ordinary People

The movie Ordinary People is a story about a family struggling to communicate. It was made in the 1980s and was directed by Robert Redford (who I love). I like it so far, it really makes me think about the relationships and reflect on my own family. It can get a little confusing though, it is one of those movies that isn't all set up from the beginning. I really like how the viewers have to figure it out for themselves. It really is a slice of real life.

Conrad is an interesting character because he is obviously drowning in the world he is living in. We find out that he has been hospitalized for attempted suicide, which gives us a little clue about what he is feeling internally. He seems to be very internal, and not letting people know how he is really feeling. He seems to be annoyed with everyone around him. And his relationship with the lady, his mother? his father's girlfriend?, is very strained. She seems to have no patience for him and doesnt' think about him at all. 

His father is a lot more concerned with Conrad. He is uneasy to talk to him though. I don't think he knows what to say but wants to say so much. I think he wants to love Conrad so much but there is a huge wall between them. I think there is a huge wall between everybody and Conrad. Everyone except his therapist. There is at first, but the wall deteriorates over time. The therapist is the only person Conrad can talk to because he is a third party. He is not directly involved in the situation. 

We find out that the main reason for all of this unhappiness is the death of Buck, Conrad's brother. I can totally understand Conrad's perspective because I have an older sibling, and I think I would probably react the same way that Conrad did if my sister ever died suddenly. His mother most likely is destroyed by the death of her son, but wants to make it seem like she is fine. She is very selfish, and doesn't think about what would be best for Conrad, or her husband. She just runs away from her problems. I have lots of experience from people trying to hide problems from the public and keeping lives private. 

The biggest problem between the family, I think, is communication. They do not communicate at all, and therefore do not function. I really like this movie so far and I can't wait to follow the story more.

Sonny's Blues

This story is really interesting to me because of the volitile relationship between Sonny and his brother. The brother seems to resent Sonny, and maybe that's because SOnny didnt have the same goals as him and he is disappointed. It seems like he was only helping Sonny out of familial obligation, not brotherly love.
This story made me think about sibling relationships and even made me think of my relationship with my sister. I kind of feel like I act like the older sibling, and try to protect my sister even though she is older. My sister and I are very different, and some of the things that annoyed the brother about Sonny I can completely connect to. The growth of the brother through this story is interesting. Sonny changed his whole perspective just by being himself. Sonny did things for himself and tried to make the best of his deteriorating life. The brother complained a lot and felt like his life didnt suit him, like he was better than his life, yet he didnt do anything to change his situation. The brother finally realized that he should not be unhappy with his life because he had a pretty good one compared to other people, including Sonny.
The brother was really cynical, which kind of bothered me. I'm glad that he changed and realized he was the creator of his destiny and if he was unhappy he could change it. He just had such a defeatest attitude. Sonny really gave him some perspective, and made him re-evaluate his attitude. I think we all need someone to show us that there are more important things in life than ourselves....Sonny could do us all some good!